Monday, May 24, 2010

How Contacts are the Most Inconvenient Convenient Invention EVER

Contacts, they are probably some of the greatest things ever invented to promote equality. Now, people with poor vision can make a choice whether to flaunt cool glasses or simply hide with on eye lenses. However, contacts bring with them certain side-effects, making simple situations more complicated, and potentially mundane days a hellish combination of pain and discomfort.

1. Getting an eyelash in your eye:


Not only do contacts seem to retain eyelashes as long as possible, or until you take your contact out, but they also seem to only do this when in public places where there are lots of people around.

2. Rubbing your eyes:


This also seems to only occur in public, and when there is no contact fluid to be found anywhere. I mean, you can't ask a perfect STRANGER for their contact fluid! It might have eye roofies in it!!!

3. At the airport or any other high security area:




Not only will you then be singled out for investigation, but there will always be someone watching awkwardly telling their child that you are a terrorist or a crazy man. 

2 comments:

  1. I've always wanted contacts but I don't think my eye would ever let my finger get close enough to put the flippin contact in there.
    and they cost money- I would rather just get them for free, thankyouverymuch.

    plus I'm too lazy :P

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  2. "there will always be someone watching awkwardly telling their child that you are a terrorist"

    Exactly why I don't wear contacts.
    Well, no, actually it's because allergies always affect my eyes badly, so it's glasses for me.

    I like the terrorist excuse better though. So I'm stealing it. :)

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